Who are you?
July 13, 2023
Photo: “Us” - original mural by members of Madison Youth Choirs, Madison, WI
Hello, friend!
How are things? I’m heading out on vacation soon, and I hope you’re finding time to relax and rejuvenate, as well. It makes such a difference.
ICYMI, every other Thursday we’re diving into big themes from my two books, Well on Your Way (WOYW) and Well in the Lead (WITL). The goal is to release the grip of things that hold us back and amplify the things that help us shine. We started two weeks ago by considering the universal worry that we aren’t enough. Today we’re focusing on identity.
As Suzanne Dove and I note in WITL, for some of us—especially those from marginalized communities—our sense of identity is paramount, impacting virtually every aspect of our experience. For others, questions of identity may take a back seat. So I’d like to bring a wide-angle lens to our exploration.
The haiku below opens both chapter 1 of WOYW, “You are not alone,” and chapter 3 of WITL, “Who are you (as a leader)?”:
Origami spirits
We fold our souls like
paper boxes. Hidden, till
rain soaked, they unfurl.
(Elizabeth Odders-White)
What does this poem mean to you? How does it connect to identity? In what ways have you folded your soul, and how have rains have led to an unfurling?
Our answers to questions like these are personal, much like our sense of identity itself. We can never fully understand anyone else’s experience. At the same time, I often find unexpected parallels that connect me to others in deep and fulfilling ways. Nothing compares to feeling truly seen and known. And that starts with seeing and knowing ourselves.
So, who are you?
And how might you continue to deepen your understanding of that?
First, do you have a clear sense of your core values? If not, these exercises could be a great start. If you’ve already identified 2 or 3 fundamental values, how are you honoring them? In what ways could you live them out more fully?
Second, I've liked having a statement of personal purpose. This blog post will guide you through the simple steps to crafting one for yourself. While you’re at it, you may also want to check out this 2-minute video on releasing unhelpful identities.
And finally, how about getting those creative juices flowing by writing your own short poem about identity? You never have to show it to anyone, though I would love (LOVE!) it if you felt inspired to share it with me.
Before I close for today, I want to explicitly acknowledge the complex challenges of navigating work and life when core aspects of our identity differ from those around us or from those in power. My own experience of this stems mostly from being a woman in a field dominated by men, which I recognize is different from the many other ways we can feel both conspicuous and invisible at the same time. I share more thoughts on this experience in the “Special note” sections of WOYW and WITL if you're interested.
I think that's plenty for now. I welcome your feedback, so please reach out any time.
As always, thanks for being here, and thanks for being you.
I wish you a wonderful couple of weeks!
Elizabeth